Monday, March 7, 2011

The play-by-play


I can hardly believe my little Oliver will be a week old tomorrow. He is the sweetest little baby and I am enjoying every minute with him. Anyway, I promised more details on the birth so here is the play-by-play:

Last Tuesday morning I woke up with some stronger-than-your-usual-Braxton-Hicks-contractions. But I didn't think much of them until I had a bought of diarrhea (a sign of impending labor) so I started washing the dishes and cleaning up. I even told my girls that maybe they'd meet their brother in the next day or two. I don't know why I told them that, because at the moment I really didn't think he would come so soon. I wasn't due for 12 more days. Then around 10:30 a.m. I lost my mucus plug and got a little giddy at the idea of having my baby soon, since when I lost it with my first pregnancy I went into labor the next day. So I called Mark and I called my mom just to give them a heads up that things might start happening in the next day or so. At 11:30 a.m. I met with my midwife, Chris, and told her about losing my plug, but she didn't seem too impressed since she'd seen women lose it as early as 6 weeks before delivery. She did, however, check her schedule for the next day to see how many appointments she would have to cancel in the event that I did go into labor. I kept telling myself that it might not happen right away, but I still wanted to be prepared in case it did. So after leaving my appointment I took Millie and Ivy to the grocery store and stocked up on some food. Then I went home and did laundry and some more cleaning. My mom was sure I was going to go into labor and wanted to come up, but I kept putting her off because I didn't want her to make such a long trip for a false alarm. After assuring her I was not in labor, I started noticing some mild contractions and decided to ask Chris to come and check me for dilation. She came around 5 p.m. and said I was around 1.5 or 2 cm. but still really "thick" and that the baby's head was not well applied. But since I never dilate much (if any) in advance, I still couldn't rule out the possibility that I was in early labor. Chris suggested I write down the contractions and see if there was any regularity to them. Meanwhile, she would be across the valley with a laboring woman in Hyde Park.

So during dinner (eggplant parmigiana cook by my sweet husband and of which he informs me I ate quite a lot) I had Mark keep track of contractions, which were not regular but were getting increasingly more painful during the meal. When I told Mark that they were starting to hurt he half-jokingly said, "You're going to scream." After that my memory goes a little fuzzy. I was indeed in labor! At some point (mom's phone says 7:23 p.m.) I called my mom and told her to start driving and had my in-laws come and take the girls. Then I had Mark get to work on getting the birthing pool ready. But I was hesitant to call Chris because I knew she was busy. When I finally decided to call her around 7:30 p.m. her student/assistant, Robyn, answered the phone and told me that the baby there was being born at the moment and that Chris would have to call me back. When she did call back it was between contractions and I was super pleasant. So when I told her that my contractions were 1.5 minutes apart and lasting 1 minute, I don't know if she really believed me. But when Mark called her back 8 minutes later (at 8:15 p.m.) to report that my water had just broken, that got her attention. At which point she asked Mark if he was ready to catch. He laughed and said, "I have my glove ready."

OK, so some of you might be freaking out by this point in the story, but just so you know, neither Mark nor I were the least bit worried. The empty house felt very peaceful and Mark even said that he had always kind of imagined it as being just the two of us. And I was just focusing on staying . . . well . . . focused.

At the beginning of each contraction I would mentally ask myself, "Is it OK that I'm having this?" I would reassure myself that it was with a, "Yes" and then let my body go limp so the contraction could do its job. Then I would engage in a number of soothing activities including counting and visualizing quick progression. I could literally feel when I dilated (it felt like tingles or pin pricks on the cervix). Although the contractions were intense I knew that the "pain" was doing something good and was not actually injuring me so there was no reason to be afraid.

I think it's funny to note that between contractions I was busy trimming my toe and fingernails in the likely event that it would be a long time before I was able to get around to it after the baby was born. I even insisted on taking a shower so I could shave. Perhaps that was more of the nesting instinct kicking in to make sure I was ready when baby arrived. Haha.

At any rate the pool finally got full enough for me to get in. It was pretty hot (since we had anticipated it losing heat as it sat there but I needed it sooner than expected!) but it still felt good and helped with the contractions. I labored in there for 10 minutes at which point the baby's head started to crown. After that contraction it was the strangest thing to reach down and be surprised to feel the top of my baby's head. While we waited for the next contraction we heard Chris pull up in the driveway and were relieved she let herself in the house. We really would have been fine delivering without her (and knew she was on her way) but I was glad she made it in time. And 5 minutes later our little Oliver was born. Mark caught him as he came out and lifted him out of the water then handed him to Chris as I moved from kneeling to sitting. Then Chris handed my baby to me and instructed me to rub his back and talk to him to get him to breathe. I said, "Hi Honey. We made it!" Moments later he let out the saddest cry and Chris called for the time of birth; 8:37 p.m. Mark dimmed the lights as I continued to sit and fall in love with my baby. Mark called to share the good news with our parents and with Millie and Ivy who had only been gone long enough to watch one movie at Grandma and Grandpa's house. I stayed in the water and waited for the umbilical cord to stop pulsing while Chris worked to cool me down with a cold wet towel, since I was turning red from the heat of the water. When the pulse stopped Chris clamped the cord and Mark cut it. Then Mark held Oliver as Chris helped me out of the pool, dried me off and got me into bed. Then in just a short time we had Oliver nursing which was the greatest thing since both my girls had a very difficult time with that in the beginning, but Oliver has been so good.
I felt a little rushed through the whole experience since it went so fast (only 3 hours of noticeable labor). But it was an amazing experience that I will cherish forever. And there was no screaming, swearing, or crying; just a lot of moaning and some grunting. All my preparations paid off and I had my very first conscious, fearless, drugless delivery. And it's all on tape if you don't believe me. :)

12 comments:

Jenny said...

I don't think I'm brave enough to have one at home but, and this is a big but, if I do have another and I can avoid the whole c-section route, natural all the way. Maybe you can be my doula or something.

Jamie said...

tamber again you're amazing!! a little crazy but i'm so proud of you. i hope you don't mind me saying but i was lucky enough to watch the delivery on tape and indeed tamber was in complete control and made it look like the easiest thing. she would make a good doula. thanks so much for sharing the experience with me. you're incredible and congrats!

Melodie Anne said...

I can never understand how anyone dares to have a home birth! It seems so terrifying! I think I've heard too many stories...

I'm so so glad that everything went well, no problems, and such a beautiful baby boy arrived safely. Congratulations on a gorgeous family and successful birth!

The Browns said...

I am so glad everything went smoothly and so FAST! I am so proud of you, I would never dare have a homebirth I am to big of a pansy when it comes to pain. Congrats again he is so adorable. I can't wait to meet him.

Diane said...

I loved that Mark said he didn't believe that you were really in labor because you were so composed. I always think it's amazing how one minute your baby's not there and then seconds later you have a brand new life that you can't remember being without. He's adorable. The kids have been talking about how "Oliver opened his tiny eyes!" Thanks again for letting us visit.

Amanda said...

You are so brave........... Thanks for sharing I love reading birth stories. He is so cute. Congrats again. Hope you are doing well.

Grandmother Pennie said...

Oliver is so beautiful and you are so brave. I saw the tape too. I checked my cell phone to get accurate times and you called me at 5:23pm and told me you did not think it would be until tomorrow and not to come. Then at 7:23pm you called to say it was the real thing and I should come and believe me I was on the road within 10 min. Then Mark called me at 8:15pm to tell me your water had broken and then he called me at 8:47pm to tell me that Oliver had arrived at 8:37pm. I am so pleased that you did your homework and made sure you took amazing care of yourself and Oliver the last nine months and that everything went so well. Lots of Love

kates said...

Well, you already know I think this whole thing is amazing, and that you were totally amazing! I'm hoping to do it just like you, minus the stitching, with luck :) Way to go, sister! Love you all!

Andersontaculer said...

Amazing. Natural births aren't as horrific as people imagine, are they? Yeah, it hurts, but you feel so accomplished when it's over! You're so brave. And Oliver looks like the sweetest little angel boy. Good job!

Heather said...

That is such a cool story (and you're so lucky that it went that fast!)I was always interested in a water birth - but since Cee was a c-section, not gonna happen for me. =( Congrats again!

Hey it's Natée said...

Oh Tamber, thank you for sharing your beautiful birthing story. You are a strong and amazing woman! I don't think you are crazy at all for taking the natural path in bringing your little Oliver into this world. I love home-births and I've often thought about becoming a doula. If I could have my own babies, I would birth them at home too, without all of the drugs, hospital monitors, distractions, etc. Well done and congratulations. I can't wait to meet him.

Katie McCaul said...

YOU ARE AWESOME!!! It is so crazy i was just talking to ladies in my ward about this...more people than i ever thought totally do this. I totally cheat the birthing experience i don't feel a thing. Good for you...hearing more and more makes me want to try it!
You guys are awesome we would have freaked out to be that close by our selves...jason gets nauseous so it would not work. Congrats he is so cute!!!